one large lump sum

ever been in an accident. did you receive a huge payment? are they coming too slowly? can't go on your trip around the world yet because of slow payments. well we have a solution for you. we will advocate for you to ensure that your payment comes in ONE LARGE LUMP SUM. not only that, our ONE LARGE LUMP SUM policy extends to other areas as well.

alimony
receipt of loan repayments
receipt of interest on loan payments
receipt of gambling debts
receipt of loan repayments from those greedy countries in the developing world
drug deals

If you have problems in any of these are, please give us a call. Because we believe in your right to affluence, and we will protect it.

** The above satirical post is not meant to be taken literally and is in no way meant to belittle or insult those who have suffered tremendous damage and whose reasonable comfort depends on fair compensation **