"Spare some change?"

You want to know what really bugs me, what really makes me feel like shit.
I live in a big city. Every day when I walk the streets, I get asked numerous times for spare change.

I am a social activist at heart. I detest the fact that a society as prosperous as ours allows some people ot fall through the cracks. It kills me to see people suffering because of the inequalities inherent to our society.

Simultaneously, though, I generally don't give money to them. My reasons for this are not the reasons of many people, such as

"He should just get a job"
"She'll just spend it on drugs"

If I give to one, I'll have to give to all. I don't have that much money. That's why. And even if I did, I wouldn't even begin to address the problem of structural inequality.

Still, I feel like shit when this happens, like I'm not walking the talk or something. Maybe that's a good thing. Maybe the more folks who feel this way, even if its on an unconscious level, the closer we will come to the creation of a just society. We shouldn't be comfortable with the fact that we allow folks to exist like this.